I finally went shopping, the whole thing passed without incident! amazing, My driver was almost helpful! managed to get a new shirt and a pair of trainers, highly impressive I think, I even found time to run away from a large dog and dish out some usually expensive health and safety advice!
Its off to Sheffield in the morning with the two boys to see if Charlton can shock us all and win away from home, should be a good game, and because of my clever arrangements I do not have to sit with the boys! so its a nice sleep on the way for me.

Sweet Jesus, its official, I hate shopping with a passion, I have had 3 encounters with shop crazed females today! on two occasions I was whacked on the ankle by shopping trolleys, once by the veg the other close to the freezer section, then some daft female type walked straight into, as she was not even looking where she was going, only one apologised, then I nearly had a fight on the bus some youth decided I was game for a bit of personal abuse, and went a bit to far, so I politely told him where to get off, he was about 18 or 19, the abuse got pretty personal so I swung round and offered to settle the issue there and then, for some reason he ran away.... so I am now at home having anger issues.....grrrrr

Right in reply to a few remarks about the Mens Trainers shop... its not for women, its a haven for us poor men of a certain age, women would be banned, as we are looking to create a pressure free atmosphere where a man can take his time over purchasing quality trainers, with out the female of the species nagging on about how long we are taking and telling you to hurry up as there is a sale in Dorothy Perkins....and besides, women are more than amply catered for, Top Shop, Dorothy Perkins, Mothercare and The Pound Shop with there wonderful range of tupperware like items..... and whilst we are at it, the staff must be male, and anyone under 35 is banned form working their, unless they look like Meg Ryan or are drop dead gorgeous.
Hope thats sorted.

Well the tickets for the game and the coach are in my hand, so there is no going back now!
I have been out shopping looking for some trainers, I am a man of simple tastes, don't want anything too flash, I have visited several shops, all the trainers seem to be white or with bling attached and priced at huge amounts of money! and the spotty youths that serve me look at me in a certain way, I am convinced they are wondering what the hell an old fart like me wants with trainers, and that I am probably buying for my son, the look of shock on their acne ridden faces when they realise I am looking for myself is a sight to behold. So i have a business idea, its about time someone opened a trainer shop that caters for mums and dads, well not so much mum's.. this shop should have comfy chairs, proper trainers, and instead of Rap being blasted out the sound system I would go for Radio 2, and there could also be a coffee bar similar to Starbucks, and all the staff should be over 35, now I think this idea is a good one, if only I could find Alan Sugars number......

After careful consideration with various parties, we reckon Charlton will be up for it Saturday, so on that basis we are going, we are also taking my godson, there is also a good reason for this, it means there will be three of us traveling, now on the coach the seats are in two's so one of us will be able to kick back with his mp3 player on and a good read all the way and a quiet snooze on the way back, wonder who that will be?

I am very seriously considering taking young Finch to see Charlton away at Sheffield United this weekend, trouble is we have not had much luck on our travels with Charlton, last season we went to Man City, for a goal less bore draw and meat and potatoe pies that had absolutely no potatoes at all, that and the stroppy mancunian female who could not understand why we were hungry after 5 hours on a coach! The season before it was Middlesborough in the FA Cup, a hideous journey for a 4-2 hammering, although one of the higlights was stopping at a quiet little transport cafe at 2am manned by one man, the 5 of us entered ordered our food and drinks, then sat back and waited and looked out on the road, the mans face when 10 full coaches of Charlton fans descended was a joy. Coupled with these memories is the fact that my beloved Charlton are playing shite! 5-3 away at Blackpool last Saturday is hardly inspiring me to splash the cash and get our sorry arses up to Sheffield! But in the back of my mind is the though, third time lucky..... so I am conducting a poll on the issue, should we stay or should we go????

Irelands Eurovision Entry - Seriously!!

I am starting to realise that going out the night before a radio show is a bad idea, It was not planned but I ended up in Greenwich with some friends drinking huge amounts and becoming attached to a hairy sausage dog! the hairy sausage dog was itself attached to a rather gorgeous looking young lady, who sadly for us was also attached to a charming young man, I am not a big dog lover but this was the strangest beast I had seen in a long time, and very friendly, I wanted to take the thing home with me! As usual on one of these nights it was decided food was the order of the day, so once we were ejected from the pub we spurned the Kebab, said no to a curry and headed for the legend that is Petes Cafe on Blackheath, It has been many years since I have been up on Blackheath after a night on the razz, Pete's Cafe serves a culinary delight that is a legend in South London, its a huge bun stuffed with everything Pete cooks, burgers, sausages, bacon, eggs, cheese and for that touch of class a pinepapple, all topped off with a dolllop of tomatoe sauce, pure heaven and served with hot sweet tea, in my eyes this is the best way to end a nights drinking, my Dr would be having a purple fit at the idea of me eating anything like it. It was absolute heaven.. and the evening was rounded off with a few hands of poker online!
Back to Englands own Craggy Island today, the Isle of Sheppey to sit in for Dave Williams on BRFM's sports show, looking forward to it, Bertie and I have some great music lined up this afternoon and just a little sport!

Now anyone at the Valley for the Watford game cannot fail to notice that The Champions League tune was given an airing, the poor man getting the blame for this is Big Dave, well its not his fault!!! it was chosen by a man with initials AP!
And BRFM's reporter has no need to worry the half time comments were aimed at GLR!
Tuen in to www.brfm.net tomorrow for more gossip

The Brits

I watched the Brits last night, what a load of old tripe, an evening like many of the award winners and guests....wasted... Why do we have to put up with that wittering bint Amy Shitehouse, ok so she has sung a few tunes, she is now more famous for her alleged drug habit, and the fact that her beloved hubby is on remand for perverting the course of justice!! Get her off the Tv, newspapers until she sorts herself out.

What on earth possessed the organisers to make the Osbourn's present it? a complete joke, and as for Vic Reeves, drunk as a skunk and looking a complete pratt.
Paul McCartney was a let down, his voice sounded shagged and he seems to play the same old tunes over an over, yes I know they are classics, but he has such a huge choice I would be so relieved to watch him and hear something other than Hey feckin Jude!!!!
Right back to my bar of chocolate.
Dont forget www.brfm.net this saturday 2-6!!!!

Watch out Saturday, I am back on BRFM 2-6pm for the Sports Show, I will be joined by Colonel Bertie, so the studio will smell of horses again! Lots of good music and all the sports news you can handle. You can listen on line at www.brfm.net and also view the webcam, so you can see what we are up to and what the horse smelling Bertie looks like! We will be taking requests, so ladies keep it clean, and remember Celine Dion is banned as is anything I deem crap......

Just been listening to Prime Ministers Questions, it seems to consist of Labour MP's asking planted questions which Gordon Brown is happy to answer, and questions from the Opposition, which he then avoids answering asks a question back then has a pop at the previous Tory Governments record, a few things strike me here, should the Prime Minister not actually answer a question, as after all it is Prime Ministers Questions (or have i missed something here) and secondly, the opposition have very few members on the front bench who were active in the last Tory Government, so maybe its time Mr Brown changed his attack.

There thats that off my chest... there all crooks anyway.

Yours in Guff Guff

Blimey England have gone and won a one day match against New Zealand, and they looked very impressive in the process, young Finch was up at some ungodly hour watching the game, sadly for him he had to nip off to school before the game ended. I watched some of the game and had to put up with Mr Negative, Nasser Hussain bumbling on in his oh so dull style, I am now starting a pressure group to have him removed from Sky!

Its Dans 12th Birthday on the 16th, 12 years? man alive it goes fast, he has already let me know that once he hits 18 he is off! so I am looking up round the world yacht races to see which ones coincide with that, do fancy battling round Cape Horn in a yacht. Dan may not have hit his teenage years yet but there are signs of the impending typical teenage manner emerging, god help us.

Watched a new show on channel 4 last night, The Big Bang Theory, seriously funny, although I cannothelp thinking they have taken the Friends set and given it a paint job!

I think I have put my back out collecting all my post today (not), I woke up feeling rather sore yesterday following Tuesday nights net practice, the suffering is nothing compared with how its progressed this morning! man alive I am so stiff I will have trouble opening all my Valentines cards.... Talking of Cricket, England have done their usual, they looked so exciting in the 20/20 games, and wiped the floor with the Kiwi's only to change the team for the one day games and get a one of the biggest ever stuffings! you may say its only a one day game, but the amount of stick I personally took is horrendous! Its bad enough watching that rubbish without having to put up with Nasser Hussain on Sky again, god that man is depressing..... he must be over doing it on the Prozac, surely someone at Sky can see he is as about as exciting as watching paint dry, he sits there and calmly tells the world what the teams are doing wrong as if he was the expert, a quick scan at his one day record is very revealing, come on Sky get shot of him!
The new Formula 1 season is just around the corner, another opportunity for the Spanish to don their black and white minstrel outfits, and for that chuntering twat James Allen to rear his ugly head, I long for the day when BBC get the coverage back, my suggestion for new commentators would be Clarkson, Captain Slow and the Hamster, it would not be dull!

Blind Date

The little horror is still getting at me about this mates mum at school, he keeps reminding me with a horrid looking grin! He has even roped my ex wife into this line of pressure, which is about as sensible as letting a vampire loose in a blood bank, as far as relationship advice is concerned I think I will get mine from John Leslie rather than there!
There is a parents evening coming up at his school, where we are supposed to meet what are laughingly described as the teachers (dont get me started on his bunch of left wing lunatics) I have a horrible feeling my son may use this as a vehicle to introduce this poor woman to me!

I note that the Governments latest wheeze is 5 hours a week cultural education, marvelous it would be nice if they bothered to educate our children properly first. The idea of my son going to the Proms, Ballet or anything cultural like that is laughable, unless their is a ball involved, fast cars or Jeremy Clarkson they have no hope with young Daniel.

We had cricket practice last night, all good fun, I was bowling away in my net and attempting to take my mates head off, whilst young Dan was bowling at our skipper, who is notoriously difficult to get out, he has the look of a Boycott about him when he bats, I was trotting back to launch my next ballistic missile when I heard the clatter of stumps and the excited shout of my son, I turned to see our Daniel dancing away and the skipper staring at his shattered stumps!

Deep Joy

Now and again as a Charlton fan you have a very good day, a day so good you want to go out and drink yourself sober, yesterday was one of those days! Millwall used to be Charlton's big rivals until we happened to share a ground with Palace, that charming man Ron Noades had his heart set on swallowing up our club into his to form a South London giant, luckily your average Charlton fan has a bit more fight in him than a Millwall thug! the fans refused to allow this, when Greenwich Council told us to bugger off from the borough we formed a political party to fight them, I am proud to say I was one of the candidates for the Valley Party, and fight them we did we managed to give Greenwich Council a very bloody nose, and unseat the chair of the planning committee, the sight of this man angrily storming out of the town hall after he had lost his seat will live with me for a long time, almost as much as seeing this odious an take a swing at a photographer! Your average Charlton fans hatred of all things Palace go back to those days, it has nothing to do with them being down the road, its the way we were treated that still to this day gets my back up, over the years I have always taken great delight in getting one over the Palace, my first opportunity came at Sparrows Lane when the Charlton Stewards took on the Palace Stewards, we were decked out in kit lent to us by the club, a magnificent 7-4 victory will live long in the memory, as will the two ambulances called to treat the poor Palace lads that underestimated us! Then a few years ago came the day we sent Palace tumbling out of the Premier League, Simon Jordan lost the plot on that occasion and took a swing out our chairman, but got his revenge by letting us have Ian Dowie! I have long suspected that Dowie was planted in the club by the desperate perma tanned Jordan..... so doing the double over Palace this season has been an absolute joy, I would have paid good money to have got a close up shot of the colour of Jordans face at full time, as he was serenaded by the North Stand in their own particular way! Neil Warnock was as gracious as ever after the game claiming the ref was against him as usual, one day this man might put his hands up and admit his team deserved to lose, i suspect that day will only come when Simon Jordan forgets to top up his tan.
I disliked Neil Warnock before he managed Palace, but now hatred is the order of the day! Oh well it was fun!
Altogether now.....my old man said be a Palace fan I said F.....................

Now to date my son, bless him jas kept out of my love life, he has not offered any advice at any stage, he has known of 3 of my female companions, including meeting on one occaision the Burberry/Silicon error!!! he does not know about dates his old man went on with varying levels of success, from G (name withheld to protect the innocent) who had to put up with the lovelorn me talking about my ex (who i was clearly still in love with)all night, bless her she is still a good friend and our chats on the phone are always a giggle! there was the Barbadian physio, brief but fun, and a few others! But the boy wonder has always let me get on with it! until today, the conversation started innocently enough, he mentioned he had really enjoyed his lunch today, then added he had part of his friends home made lunch and that it was pretty good, all seemed fair enough to me, so I moved off into the kitchen "my mates mum is single dad" he delivered that line and shuffled back into the living room, me being who i am was not prepared to leave it there, so i asked why he mentioned her being single, it transpires he and his mate spent the entire lunch discussing the idea that their parents would make a great couple! little sod, he follwoed me around the house telling why she would be good and the fact he and his mate have decided it would be a good idea...... jesus wept if I really wanted any help in that area I do not think advice form an 11 year old is high on my list!!!!

Genius - Based on the writings of Gerard Hoffnung (1925 - 1959)

Uncomfortable

Have just realised that it is very uncomfortable to sneeze and fart at the same time!