Nash Point

I sat here yesterday sketching and painting whilst Charlton were disappearing into Championship League oblivion, I missed all the first half updates as my phone had no signal....bliss

Greetings, I have just returned from Wales, had a nice weekend in Wales bit of shopping, not much walking though the old knee seems to be well and truly knackered, I had Cricket practice on Thursday, bowled for a long period and ever since the knee has been very sore, think a trip to the Dr is required here.
Now I am due to finish BRFM on 19th, had a few emails from the boss, and as a result I am now contemplating finishing now, I spend nearly £100 a month going down there, at no stage has anyone from the station offered me a contribution, and I missed last weekends show because of a slight hiccup (I was not at Charlton as some suspect) and have been bollocked for it, I emailed the weekend manager as I was told to tell him I was away this weekend, and on Saturday the big boss emails me a bollicking....and hoists a trainee on me for my last few shows, no asking if is ok, just telling me, frankly I have had enough, the equipment is a joke, things that we were told we would have have not appeared, so will be thinking hard this week.

World Peat Bog Snorkelling

The Date: 27th August: The Venue: Llanwrtyd Wells: The Event: Bog Snorkelling World Championships.
Who is up for it with me then?

Shit or Bust

Well it really is crunch time for Charlton this weekend, we desperately need 3 points from the game against Blackburn, at the moment 5600 fans are going up to the game, sadly I will be on the M4 at the time! So 3 points at Ewood Park then 3 points at home to Spurs should be enough.....
Dont forget to tune into www.brfm.net May 12th 4-7pm for the Eurovision Special, confirmed guests are Bucks Fizz, Brotherhood of Man, Johnny Logan and Jahn Teigen, Jahn is the Norwegian who scored nil points and from talking to him over the years its obvious he is completely barking mad! We also have our fingers crossed for a huge, and I cannot emphasis enough how huge, star from Eurovision in the 70s! If Tom can get himself in gear we may also have a member of this years UK entry, Scooch. Joining me in the studio will be Colonel Bertie, Matt Aucott and maybe Simon "i'm not your dad" Emmett. We will be playing the best and the worst of Eurovision over the years and believe me there is some quality rubbish out there, Bertie and I have been having fun listening to the stuff we have dug out.
Yours in anticipation

Should I have it off?

Well the day is nearly here when I have to make some pretty big decisions.. should I have it off? or not? before anyone gets too excited I should explain, I visited my barber today who commented on my crown (not a bald spot), her opinion was that the crown is expanding to such a level that I might consider shaving the lot off! now this is a major thing for any man, at the moment its not too bad, but the front is receding and the crown is getting larger..... I may conduct a vote on this issue!

Fletcher Resigns

Well it had to happen didnt it? and there I was thinking every one would agree that he had to go, until I switched on Sky Sports and there was Mr One Tone, Nasser Hussein, who was blaming everybody else other than Duncan Fletcher, is Nasser blind stupid or has he been adopted by Duncan Fletcher, every cricket expert in the world agrees that Fletch had to go, except Nasser, who was given a right going over of his views by Charles Colville the Sky Sports presenter, who was obviously stunned by Nassers views regarding Duncan Fletcher, every time Nasser defended him Colville got stuck in, with all the facts presented to Nasser he still refused to blame Fletcher in any way, man alive I hope Nasser never does jury service......

Come on Sky do us all a favour and get rid of Mr One Tone, he is so out of touch its stunning

England Surrender

Well to cap it all off, after having to listen to Nasser Hussein I have just watched England be utterly humiliated by South Africa in the World Cup, this team that Duncan Fletcher has assembled has been a total failure, who have we actually beaten in this world cup that was any good? nobody, Fletcher has had 4 years to prepare a team for the World Cup and was still experimenting up to the start of the damn thing, whilst the majority of sides have had a settled side for the past 18 months. Even before Vaughan damaged his knee he was not a very good one day player, yet we patch him up get him fit, for what? he is no good at one day stuff. As for Freddie, a man who has carried this team through the Ashes, and the one day series in oz, the poor lad has a few too many and gets into difficulty in a pedalo and he is Vice Captain no more, now dont tell me this has not had an effect on his form, because it quite clearly has. Vaughan and Fletcher must carry the can for this debacle and must be sacked immediately! and whilst we are at it can they take Steve McLaren with them, another useless waste of space....
Please note I was in a very good mood when I left work today, but Nasser has sent my mood into a tailspin. and I pray to god that James Allen does wander into my aim over the next few days!
You know I think I have reached middle age, thats what this is all about!!!
Yours in disbelief

Nasser 'one tone' Hussein

Right, I have to get this off my chest, and it has absolutley nothing to do with the fact that South Africa are thrashing the arse of England as I write this...... Since England travelled to Australia late last year for The Ashes this has been bugging me, or rather this man has been bugging me. Which smart alec suit wearing Sky exec decided that it would liven up their cricket coverage if they hired Nasser Hussein as a commentator? I think we should be told so I can go round and deal with them personally...Nasser Hussein has a single tone voice, that is irritating the life out of me, I spent 3 weeks off work with a severe bollock injury and had to listen to this seriously dull man drone on with is criticism's of everything that the inexperienced Captain Flintoff did, this twat happily sits in the box and spouts his one tone drivel as if he won the bleeding lot!!! well lets look at what Nasser won..... did he win the Ashes? did he win the World Cup? no on either count, and I recall a decision to ask the Aussies to bat first on a great batting pitch in Brisbane as being a high point of Mr Borings career, sure he won a few series, but he presided over an Ashes defeat and our failure to qualify from our group in the last World Cup, so I really do not appreciate this experts opinions, he would put a downer on a lottery win, get this man of the tv now!!! and whislt we are at it, can we lose David Pleat, and Trevor Francis, David Pleats analysis crawls along like a punter looking for a hooker in Kings Cross (not libellous) and Trevor Francis? hand me a razor blade...... and finally the wittering twat that is ITV's James Allen, shoot the bloody lot of em!!!
Yours in a bit of a rage

Eurovision Drinking Game

Why not host a Eurovision Party on May 12ht, to make the party go with a bang try the Eurovision Drinking Game, word of warning keep 13th free for recovery!

Drink two fingers...

Presenters

• Terry Wogan makes a satorical comment that no-one laughs at.
• Presenters try to be funny.
• Female presenter changes her dress
• Male presenter changes his dress - drain your glass
• Bad time delays during video/audio link
• Presenters overlapping with voter during video/audio link because of the bad delay
• Presenters having a time-wasting conversation that no-one can follow, understand or care less about.
• Tezza's predictions come true.

Performers

• Performer resembles someone you know.
• Performer resembles another famous person. Drink four fingers if that person is present in the audience. Drain your glass if the camera zooms in and lingers on that person.
• Singers wave their arms around whilst singing.
• Singers put excessive emotion into their singing.
• Tacky and nonsensical song titles (shoo-wop etc.)
• Main singer is grossly overweight.
• Singers try to join in with musicians during instrumentals.
• France does not conduct a musical experiment.
• Retro/out-of-date clothing and hairstyles.
• Singer from eastern Europe has faked blond hair.
• Bad dress-sense. Four fingers if it's blatently offensive.
• Visible/prominant nipples/genitalia.
• The Maltese performer does not have a hairy chest.
• High & loud obnoxious noises emitted from singer during their act.
• Unnecessary dancing.
• Act steals ideas from Eurovision acts from previous years
• Interaction with the audience. Four fingers if the audience is unusually passive.
• Dancing that surpasses belief and credibility.
• Foreign acts sing in English.
• Singer flirts with the camera when she has finished her song.
• The song goes up half an octave in the last refrain.
• A style of music that would be ruined by appearing in EuroSong.
• A country from Former Yugoslavia has a depressing song.
• Countries where the lead singer is not a native of that country.
• Use of atmospheric panpipes

The judging

• Reference made to Norway's null point.
• Cyprus gives Greece 12 points.
• Every time Norway gives Sweden any points but not vice-versa.
• Every time there is an Irish performer in a foreign act.
• France gives United Kingdom null point.
• Acts where the lead singer is attractive and receive high (8+) points and the act is crap.
• Surprising voting - you judge what's surprising!
• United Kingdom come second.
• Ireland win yet again.
• A question about Israel's presence.
• Politically-related effects during the act (eg. Croatian singer removing black gown to reveal white dress signifying "coming out of the darkness and into the light").
• Acts are on their mobile phone to their family during voting. Increase to a whopping four fingers if they're on the phone during their act.

Television coverage & venue

• Bad telecommunications link.
• Preview video is completely pointless and/or a blatant fragmented tourist advert for the host country
• Preview video is full of gormless smiles.
• National symbols are seen somewhere.
• Special effects are:
  1. Cheesy
  2. Better than the song
• Both (obviously this is a case for four fingers' worth)

Drain your glass...

• If the winning country decline to hold the event next year due to:
  1. Financial reasons
  2. Political reasons
  3. Personal reasons
  4. Moral reasons
  5. All of the above
• If Germany spares one single point for her southern neighbour, Austria.
• If your own country comes first.
• If Norway does not give Sweden any points.
• Drink everything in sight if the United Kingdom come first and you're British.
• If Greece gives Turkey any points then stop drinking!. This is very unlikely to happen so you must be veeeeeery drunk at this time. GO TO BED.
• Germany's song does not mention peace, harmony or love...

Of course, it's always a good idea to try and consume a single shot of alcohol native to a given country.

Oh dear, my son Dan has pulled a muscle, and is having terrible trouble walking at the moment, so dad has had to take a day off, and his mother is taking a day off tomorrow. So as a result I am at a loose end today so stand by for more Eurovision stuff!

Charlton Lose

Oh dear Charlton lost to Everton in the last seconds of injury time, and now our game at the Valley against Sheff Utd next Saturday is a real 6 pointer and now one of the most vital games ever as far as the reds are concerned, now I have a serious problem, I am due to be on BRFM next Saturday, the weekend after Dave is sitting in whilst I am at Hotel Finch in South Wales, so next Saturday, do I do BRFM or do I throw a sickie? help......

Well its official I finish at BRFM on 19th Mat with the FA Cup Final, after that Dave Williams will be taking over the Sports Show, and you may just here me pop up now and again live from the Valley! Which leaves me free to enjoy Saturdays again! If you get a chance have a listen to the show before mine, for budding presenters it an education......
Isaac our media studies student, who has been with us for a few weeks was dispatched to the Sittingbourne home game to report for us, which gave John Pitts the opportunity to concentrate on a spot of ref baiting, Isaac did very well, alas for poor John freed of his media commitments he was unable to have a pop at the ref as it seems he turned out by all accounts to be a home banker. Now last week we got Isaac to do the dog tips, it quickly became apparent that he was useless at it, so I was very surprised when he tipped a horse in the Grand National, Hedgehunter, even more surprising was that he had put £10 on the thing....sadly for Isaac, said horse finished 9th! the rest of us tipped horses that fell somewhere along the way but we were not daft enough to have cash on it!! A highpoint for today was my son Daniel's radio debut, he came on and let everyone know the starting positions for tomorrows Grand Prix, he did very well and seemed oblivious to nerves.......
Yours with pride

BRFM

As mentioned earlier in my blog I was considering leaving BRFM, and I can confirm that my last show will be on Saturday May 12th with the Eurovision Special, it has been good fun and I have to thank Dave Williams, John Pitts, Simon Emmett and of course my long suffering son Dan for all of their help on the show. It has just become to difficult with the cost of transport (trains) and the 4+ hour round trip, when you add the 3 hours of the show it is around about 8 hours on a Saturday, which has had an effect on my personal life, and with things picking up in that front I need to consider that and my finances, so I have had little choice really. I will return soon online with Fleet FM and on FM at some stage this year.
Thanks
Pete.

Vindication

Now my last rant, sorry blog was to tell you about my Graham Poll incident on Monday evening, and lo and behold my assessment has been proved to be correct following the this statement from the FA,

"Having reviewed video footage (referee) Graham Poll expressed his view that the incident warranted a red card," said an FA statement.

Now apparently Leroy Lita (slapheaded over rated Reading striker) headbutted Tala El Khakouri, Graham Poll missed it which just goes to prove my assessment that Graham Poll is a myopic twat who needs to borrow my glasses, now if Lita had been sent off I suspect we would have beaten Reading, now when you consider Poll was in charge when we played Fulham at the Valley over Christmas, when the refs assistant wrongly gave a free kick for handball when it was clearly a Charlton free kick , which then led to Fulham equalising in the final seconds of the game, then these two acts of myopia have cost us 4 points, one glance at the current table will tell you the damage Mr Poll has done hence my abuse...although I am not bitter!!!!
Yours in a rage

Poll Laugh Shocker

Well, there I was at the Valley in the North Stand with Simon Emmett, now we have discovered that Daniel is a calming influence on me at games, Poor Simon was subjected to my most abusive behaviour ever at a football match, most of the tirade was aimed at Graham Poll! The hapless official from Tring was giving one of his usual inept performances, midway through the first half Mr Poll made another one of his shocking decisions, at this point Simon and I stood up and offered a full and frank appraisal of his abilities as a ref and as a human being, I also very pointedly offered him my glasses...Now my glasses were off and I did not see his reaction but I am assured by independent supporters that Graham Poll saw this gesture and laughed!!!
So I made Graham Poll laugh!!!

The things I do for the Radio Show!! I have spent 3 hours with Kev the Music. 3 hours of trawling through Eurovision failures to find some gems to bring you on May 12th, god there has been some crap! But we have found some really awful songs so bad they are good! Colonel Bertie is going to a do Eurovision Be Bop Bonanza made up of some of the best and worst of Eurovision.

I am thinking of jacking in the Saturday Show at the end of May the traveling is, frankly getting a bit much, if I go by train its a 4 hour round trip and it means my whole Saturday is focusing on my show, and leaves me with no time for my own social life which at the moment is non existent!
Good news GRFM is dead and long live Fleet FM! There will be a new radio station launched soon in the Gravesend area, keep an eye out for more info soon!

Well we are back from Manchester, out of the bottom three for the first time since September, we had a dodgy first 10 minutes but settled down but in the second half we were the best team.
If you have the joy of visiting Man City I would recommend taking your own food, the stadium food was shocking, the staff rude and there was bugger all in terms of choice, took great delight in being called a southern twat by some poor misguided Mancunian chav...
Here's to 3 points against Reading on Monday night....come on you reds!!

I have just watched Cetin Alp from 1983, it explains what John Travolta got up to in the early 80's.
We are off to Manchester now so there will be no posts today. just 3 points for Charlton.
Yours in expectation

Right we have a new clip on the bottom right. well actually its vintage 1983, Cetin Alp and the Shortwaves, represented Turkey with a lovely ditty called Opera, sounds good so far until you learn the poor Cetin scored nil points! as did the Spanish, now the Spanish tune was just plain bad, and there was no excuse, on the other hand Cetin's offering was stunningly bad, so bad it has become a classic in our eyes, have a look at the video, Terry Wogan gives a brief hint of what is looming with a translation of the lyrics, it builds up to an awesome chorus, give it a whirl...go on you know you want to. I am off up to Manchester to watch the mighty reds in action against Man City, so there will be no preview of the show, as we have bugger all planned except good tunes and footie news, oh and we have a media student being let loose amongst us, Isaac is his name and he sounds like he knows his stuff, best be on our guard then....
Yours in full tenor

The 1985 European Spread Your Lurve Tour

Just to prove I was once fit and active, I am the handsome devil in the middle!! This particular shot was taken in Istanbul, and must be in the morning, two things lead me to suspect this a) we look very sober b) the lack of female company..... The other two in the photo are on the left Signalman T Hotston, Royal Corps of Signals and Nigel "showwaddy" Waddy, quiet but deadly with the ladies!
Yours in youthful vigour

Well have a look at the video of Verka Serduchka! its on the bottom right. Man alive there is very little I can say about it, just watch and be amazed, now the worrying thing is thats its an Former Eastern Bloc entry and that lot are very quickly building up a reputation for keeping the twelve points to themselves, its utter drivel, but due to the voting patterns be afraid!!
Coming soon we will publish the full Eurovision Drinking Game, trust me when I say if you follow the rules you will end up utterly wasted clutching a bottle of Bombay Sapphire muttering about god knows what and be left with the most horrendous hangover of your life.
Yours in disbelief

As you can see we have Scooch on the in the box, click on and watch them in action, coming soon will be some classic Eurovision, the good the bad and the plain hilarious! And further down on the right is Ark - The Worrying Kind, from Sweden, this is my early favourite.

I have just been looking at Israels entry, Push the button by Teacakes, which is a protest song, and frankly its rubbish and does not have a prayer!!! Luckily they are in the Semi Final and should not get anywhere near the Final on May 12th, although saying that with Eurovision you never know!!

Going away from Eurovision, I have been asked to post some pictures from my 1985 Tour of Europe which featured myself, Nigel, Trevs and Gordon (who escaped to New Zealand) the tour has now been christened the Spread Your Luuuurrrrve tour, lucky we have photos as the majority of it is a blur, including names and dates!! I will consider scanning, but bearing in mind I was young and extremely fit, it may be difficult as I fear that too many ladies will swoon when seeing me in my youth.
Yours in reflection